A New Perspective on My Self’s Center

Step 2: Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

In reflecting on what I want to speak about on November 14, I felt grateful because a few new insights came to me.

My participation in our 12 Step Spirituality program at Colonial Church, with its focus on Step 11, began as a teacher of Centering Prayer. Inspired by the humility and honesty of the many folks who share their stories at Colonial, I began to feel safe enough to speak about my long history dealing with some self-defeating and relationship-harming qualities which might be called codependent.

On October 14, I want to speak about how, through wanting to be in control and in charge of my life, I painfully discovered the delusional quality of some of my efforts at showing love. I saw how faulty expectations of myself, which had become habitual, often stemmed from a false self that sought approval and affection. I needed, and then found, a new perspective, which came from realizing my self’s center is not in myself but in God.
~Mary W.